we're blogging at a bar
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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