it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
