Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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