the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
