Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
