You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
she told me i tasted like america
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
