I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
