She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
