Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
