Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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