Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He passed out mid-signature
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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