But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
