I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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