So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
