Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
