3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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