CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
