I puked a lego.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It's never too late to be topless.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
