lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Apparently you make a good broom.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
