She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
