she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
third nipple confirmed
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize