you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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