Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
