Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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