His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
