I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
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