I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize