Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
