She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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