I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
