I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
