That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
