Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize