i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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