Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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