The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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