i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
