I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
