I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Randomize
