My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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