it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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