Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
