i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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