JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
