Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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