I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
