I bet he comes in French.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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