The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize