I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
