just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
