that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
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